This weekend, my granddaughter Emersyn came to spend the night with us. This is a fairly normal occurrence, and it is one that we all look forward to. She gets pampered in every way, and we delight in lavishing attention on her. Joe will always get her favorite foods to eat, and I am the “game” person who plays with her. I found myself thinking this morning, “how long before she considers us outdated and old-fashioned?”
Emersyn in seven going on fifteen, and if you have a grandchild, you probably know what I mean. One minute she is a little girl playing with her dolls and watching cartoons, and the next minute she is challenging me to a game of chess and putting on makeup.
From experience with myself and my children, I know that she will start coming to our house less and less often at some point. She will start to think of us as “old” and out of date. In my mind, I can already see her rolling her eyes when I say something. I know it is part of the growing up phase, but it will still be painful.
The funny thing is, it will be painful for both of us. One night when we were saying three things that we were thankful for, she replied, “NeeNee, NeeNee, and NeeNee.” My heart was bursting with love, and my eyes were brimming with tears.
I told her how sweet that was, and then I made the mistake of talking to her about the future. I told her that we had a special bond, but I knew that she would want to spend time with her friends instead of me once she got older. In my explanation, I told her that it would be alright because I knew that she still loved me.
When I looked over, she was in full out tears. She was devastated at the thought, and I was devastated that I had made her cry. We talked for a long time, and I was able to comfort her that maybe she would be different, and maybe she would always want to spend time with me.
As I was writing in my Bible journal this morning, the Bible verses from Matthew kept running through my mind.
Matthew 18:2-4
2 He called a little child to him, and placed the child among them. 3 And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4 Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.
I started thinking about how I spend time with the Lord, my Heavenly Father. Did I still look forward to spending time in His company, or did I put Him on the back burner? Was His teachings “old” and outdated? Did He understand that as a struggling believer that I would sometimes put others or things before Him? Would He know that I still loved Him even though I wasn’t making Him a priority?
Like Emersyn, I was devastated at the thought, and it made me cry. I know that the Lord’s arms are always open, but how many times have I disappointed Him by choosing something trivial over spending time with Him? I have my Bible study journals on top of my computer every morning to not forget to spend time with the Lord. But, how many times do I do the journals out of “ritual” instead of “desire?”
Lord, I pray that You will make me as a little child. I pray that my desire to be with You will never wane and that I will come to you with desire. Lord, please make me different!
To God Goes The Glory!
Have A Blessed Day!
What a perfect comparison with your conversation with your granddaughter and our time spent in prayer and talking with our Lord. A poignant perspective!! Thank you!!!
So well put. Thank you for being so open.
Oh Tania you were in my mind. How often I have thought the very same thing. I desire to put the Lord first but then often get on to other things of the day. Sometimes even when I do put the Lord first, I find my mind wondering in my devotion. I think about the Lord throughout the day and praise and thank him for my blessings. It can be just one sentence. I know he knows my heart. You have made me cry. I always pray to be the best I can be and ask for God’s help in this. We can go on with our fellow Christians praying each day no matter the simplicity or complexity of our devotion. God hears us all.
Fran, you were just in my mind. I can’t tell you how many times that my mind has wandered during prayer and devotions. UGH!!!
I love that your Sunday blogs are what I am thinking and need to hear.
That makes me so happy, Kim!