FEELING HELPLESS
I watched a news clip where this reporter was covering the disaster and she asked a woman a question. The woman was in pain and shock. She had her children with her and she lashed out in anger at the reporter. She kept saying something in the nature of, “Why are you sticking that microphone in my face? Can’t you see that I’ve lost everything? My children are hungry and you are sticking a microphone in my face, why?” Frustration, anger, helplessness. All of those things were evident in her outburst.
We have all been there. I have been in both of these ladies shoes and I am sure you have too. I have witnessed someone in pain and I have been that someone in pain. How can you adequately express how bad you feel when a friend has lost her house in a fire? What words can comfort someone who has just found out that they have cancer? When everything that someone has worked for their entire life is flooded and they feel helpless, what can you do?
Prayer. I think that sometimes people say that they are praying and that we have become almost immune to hearing that. I see all the time that someone puts up a post of loss or hurt and then you will see lots and lots of people commenting, “praying.” That is wonderful but do you really take time to pray or just to type the message. I have tried to adopt the habit of stopping what I am doing and say a small prayer right then because if I don’t then I might get busy and forget.
Action. I think we should always say a prayer for those in need but there are times when we should go a step further. It is not always possible but when we have the opportunity then we should follow our prayer by an action. When someone has lost their house then we can try to provide clothing or something else that they might need. If we know someone who has lost someone close to them then maybe we could provide a meal for them. If someone is going through a sickness then maybe we can offer to help clean their house or do errands. There are so many tiny little things we can do to show that we care. In the case of the hurricane victims, my action is coming in the form of a donation. I don’t know anyone personally but I can still try to help in a small way.
Comfort. There are many times when there is nothing you can say or do that will help. In those time, a hug or just being there can help. In times of hurt maybe a person needs to know that someone cares, that they have a shoulder to lean on. When we have lost something or someone a natural response is fear and anger. Hold your friend, listen to your friend, empathize with your friend, and say a prayer with your friend. Remind them that the Lord is with them and has not forsaken them.
Psalm 50:15 And call upon me in the day of trouble: I will deliver thee, and thou shalt glorify me.
James 5:13 Is any among you afflicted? let him pray. Is any merry? let him sing psalms.
I often feel so inadequate and I feel that saying, “I am so sorry for your loss” is not enough. In those times we need to remember to pray and to remember that the Lord has a plan. And while we can not even begin to imagine how heartbreak and loss can be a part of His plan, we are to trust in Him and in His ways.
Have A Blessed Sunday!
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Your post was very touching and near to my heart. My heart breaks for those affected by the Hurricane. I also believe in Prayer, Action and Comfort. I suddenly became a young widow 11 years ago with 2 young sons. There are lots of things I learned through this horrible time in my life, but one that comes top of mind is if you say “let me know if you need anything”, please don’t just say those words if you don’t follow up on them. I wasn’t one to ask for any type of help, so if you really want to help someone going through loss, call them occasionally, check up on them, don’t wait for them to reach out to you because most likely they won’t. When you have a loss like this, after the funeral and all that is involved, people go back to their regular life and your life will never be the same. I’m doing well now, although a hole will always be in my heart, and my boys are wonderful, but after going through my loss I always feel like I need to share some of what I have learned. Thank you for your post! Paula
Paula, thank you for sharing. I think what you said is perfect. I know that when I say to someone “let me know if you need anything” I will usually follow up by saying, “I am serious, do not hesitate to let me know.” However, I am guilty of not following back up with them unless it is someone I am close to. A blogger friend’s husband is going through a terrible time right now with a cancer diagnosis. They are beautiful people and wonderful Christians. She recently said that her husband told her that they were going through this so that one day they could walk with someone else going through the same trials. I know that you have helped others and sharing what you have learned is essential. Thank you for that.
Thank you so much for being able to put this into words… I feel the exact same way in all those circumstances.. you are a blessed women to be able to put that into words. I pray the Lord blesses you and your family always!!!
Tisha, the words don’t come easy. It is hard to express how you feel in these circumstances. I am thankful for so much!
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on the tragedy in Houston. I too love reading your blog daily and especially on Sundays when you share the words our Maker put on your heart. God bless.
Laurie, thank you so much. I know that I am not the best writer nor am I the perfect Christian. I do pray that the Lord uses me to reach someone who is looking for Him.
You expressed exactly what I have felt about this disaster and so many other losses. With them, actions soak louder than words.
I am terrible when it comes to funerals because I have this “gene” where I want to fix everything. I feel so terrible for the person who is suffering and helpless to help. I am usually crying as I enter the doors of the funeral home even if I don’t even know the people there. Praying for them is all I can really do.
Oh dear friend that was a beautiful lesson – reminder of God’s presence in all of life! Thank you for using your blog to further God’s kingdom! I loved reading this and hearing Lauren speak! Blessings!
Charlcy, I listened and cried. She is a beautiful soul.
Tania – I live in Houston. We are so fortunate to live in an area where we did not get water in the house, but as you have seen, thousands upon thousands had their homes destroyed & everything lost. I wrote this post and am sharing if it would be helpful to anyone. http://mysideof50.com/pray-victims-hurricane-harvey/
Cathy, I am thankful that you and your loved ones were spared the flooding. But seeing the effects of the hurricane on others is devastating as well. Thank you for your post, it was lovely and perfect. Praying is essential and I know that I am at a loss sometimes for what to say.
Thank you! Texas Strong through the tears! Strangers doing good and helping neighbors or people across town, so beautiful in the midst of so much hurting. The response from around the world has been beautiful and so inspiring. People are so much better when they work together!
Amen Tania!!!! Great reminders. My heart breaks for all the victims in Texas. Not only am I praying for the victims, I am praying for all the volunteers, policeman, fireman, EMT, Red Cross, Doctors, Nurses and this list can go on and on. I think any kind of donation helps because it adds up. Our town is taking donations of bottled water and paper products. Blessings to you ~Lisa~
Thank you!
Lisa, I agree with you. The rescue workers and caregivers all need our prayers. It is devastating for them as well. I know our church usually takes up donations when something like this happens but since I am out of town I don’t know what they are planning.
Those beautiful sentiments from your heart do say it all. Thank you for sharing Tania xxx
Have a good Sunday!