I WILL SAY A PRAYER
How many of you have uttered the words, “I will say a prayer for you?” I know I have said that many times, and I try to stop whatever I am doing at the time, and say a prayer. I don’t want to get busy and forget to pray for someone after I have said I would. But these are prayers said in private. These are words whispered at night when I go to bed. I have never prayed in front of anyone.
One of the first things I learned when I became President of our local woman’s club, was to always ask the person you had in mind to perform a task. If you wanted someone to lead the Pledge of Allegiance To The Flag, then you should ask them before the meeting to make sure they were fine with that. However, when Bertha became President a couple years later, she didn’t get that memo. At the beginning of the meeting, we will have a Thought For The Day, have prayer, and then eat a light meal before the “real” meeting starts. Bertha said, “Tania, will you lead us in prayer?” I was thrown for a loop, I stammered, NO! I just froze.
Typing is one thing, but talking is completely different. I had a hot spot on my Thyroid. I know you are thinking what does this have to do with prayer. The doctors decided that my over active hot spot would have to be radiated. The plan was to “kill” the hot spot and leave the rest of my thyroid alone. That is not what happened. Now I have to take thyroid medicine daily. One of the symptoms of thyroid issues has to do with memory and words. I can be talking to you and need to say the word telephone. I can tell you that you can make calls with this object, that you talk to people through it, but the word “telephone” will not come to mind. This is extremely uncomfortable when you are talking to anyone, you feel like an idiot. So saying a prayer, that is not one that has been memorized, is terrifying for me.
In a devotional this week, a lady was talking about someone being at her home do some odd jobs. After talking to this young man, she felt the uncomfortable nudge from the Lord to ask the young man if she could pray for him. He responded yes! She fought down the uncomfortable feeling, and did what she felt was prompted. In the end the young man was blessed, but so was she.
I am still working on my prayer life. I talk to the Lord as I would my father, my best friend, and my confidante. He knows me, and I am striving to know him. I ask for him to open my eyes and my heart. And I ask what I can do for him, what would please him.
Maybe in the future, I will be able to say a prayer out loud. But, until then, I will say a prayer for you in private.
I hope you have a blessed day.
I appreciate how you have opened your life up to so many people by writing your blog. Your candor and honesty are such a blessing to me.
Thanks Kathe! I just write what I am feeling. I don’t even think about it as being open or honest, it just is me. I hope the Lord is using my messed up personality to his benefit.
I don’t know if this will help, but I sat down and thought about praying and what makes a prayer “good”. Keeping those parts in mind helps me formulate a prayer that will convey the message I want when I’m taken by surprise. May we all continue to grow spiritually and share with others. Thank you for sharing important parts of your life with us.
Tania,
I, too, have a memory problems due to MS. However, being nervous at the thoughts of speaking publicly of any kind, I have discovered the more I have feebly attempted praying out loud the easier it has become. I hope this is encouraging and I will be praying for you.
Thank you so much Patricia. It is encouraging, and I know that the more you do something, the easier it becomes. It is that FIRST hurdle that is the hardest.
Wow, everything you said resonated with me today! Thyroid issues, praying aloud, that word on the tip of my tongue, praying for someone before I forget. Thank you for this post. Have a blessed Sunday, Tania!
I am glad I am not the only one like this, Terry.
Oh my, I remember a Pastor I had once. He would call on male and female for closing prayer. He called on me a few times and I got through it, but ask me what I prayed and I could not tell you. Then I went from Baptist to Pentecostal (I call it Bapacostal lol) It was then I learned “how to pray”. I still have trouble praying in a crowd, but I do like you….just talk like he’s my best friend, which he is! I totally agree with you, please give us a head’s up so we can at least get our “nerves” in order. lol lol Have a blessed day Tania!
Oh my goodness…I love this post….I have recently been struggling with this same issue. It’s only recently that I’ve found my faith and have been blessed with a lovely church family. I’m in several small groups and we always begin and end with prayer. Last week I was one of the discussion leaders. Having been a teacher, leading the discussion was not an issue but I was paralyzed with fear over the prayer. Fortunately my co-leader took that part of our responsibility. For years, off and on but with little faith that I was heard, I’ve had, what I call, conversations with God…in the car, when I’m walking or running or alone at home. I’m weird in that I always felt more “heard” if I said the words aloud. So I don’t know why I can’t say them aloud in front of others, even grace before dinner. I think some of my hesitation is that I never felt worthy of God’s love until the past year or so. I have so much joy now. So I hope to reach the point where I can find the appropriate prayer words for various occasions and be comfortable sharing them with others. Have a good Sunday.
Thank you for such a prayerful message. I agree that most people are uncomfortable praying aloud. It has nothing to do with their faith. A dear friend who is a great public prayer gave me the “close your eyes tip and talk from your heart”. But I too suffer from a thyroid condition. And for a person who had no trouble with public speaking and off the cuff presentations, the inability to find the right word WAS embarrassing. I found that it makes me be a better listener. So maybe God was trying to tell me something. LOL thanks again for a beautiful post.
I am one that likes to be prepared. I try to dress nice, have my makeup on, and know what I am speaking about when I talk in front of others. My thyroid issues have gotten better because of medication. There was a time, long ago, when I didn’t even want to answer the phone. You’re right, it was embarrassing.
Thank you for your prayers and God bless you
I just love you girl!!! God bless.?
Thank you for inspiring me to be a better person. On the outside and the inside.