DO YOU FEEL LIKE A POSER OR AN IMPOSTER

Confident, strong, courageous, fearless, adequate, loving, intelligent, God-fearing, kind, giving, and competent are words that I would love to use to describe myself. But, usually, those aren’t the ones that I say to myself. Instead, mine is generally filled with doubt and anxiety over not measuring up to the bar I set for myself. Can anyone else relate to this?

Inadequate is how I usually feel, and so many people feel this way that there are a couple of terms used to describe this feeling. It is called the Imposter Syndrome, or as the younger kids call it, a “poser.” These terms refer to how we view ourselves as we try to navigate life. It might look like we know what we are doing, but we feel like we are failing inside.

Probably the first time that I felt like an imposter was when my son was born. Looking down at his tiny little face, I worried that I was inadequate and had no idea how to be a mother. I’d read all the books, but when faced with the reality of raising a child, I was terrified.

My son turned out to be an amazing young man, and he now has exceptional children of his own. He survived, and I did the best that I could to be a good mother. Once again, can anyone else relate to this?

I see other mothers who seem like they have it all together, but I bet they have felt the same way. We tend to think the worst-case scenario, pick ourselves apart, and put a lot of pressure on ourselves that doesn’t need to be there. Why do we do that???

This past week, I randomly did an Instagram story about going to the hairdresser. I must have been feeling a little inadequate about my blogging abilities because, in the end, I asked, “why do you follow me?”

I’m not sure why I did that; I didn’t want a pat on the shoulder; I was just curious why someone would want to follow me. I don’t know what I am doing, I fly by the seat on my pants, and I feel like a poser when it comes to this arena.

When the comments started coming in, I was amazed at how many women said that I had made a difference in their lives. I didn’t expect that; I was overwhelmed and amazed that anyone felt like that. It made me feel amazing and extremely grateful that the Lord had given me this platform. I had let the enemy seep into my thoughts instead of remembering who I was.

Psalm 139:14

14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

Isaiah 64:8

Yet you, Lord, are our Father. We are the clay, you are the potter; we are all the work of your hand.

Ephesians 2:10

10 For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

I am God’s creation, His daughter, and I have a purpose. He is my maker, and I am not an imposter or a poser. The Lord formed me in my mother’s womb, He breathed life into me, and He watches over me every second of the day. With the Lord as my Father, why would I ever doubt His creation?

After all, the lovely and uplifting comments I received, I went back on my stories to thank everyone. I also wanted to give them a challenge, and I am extending this challenge to you also. I am calling it my Jar to Bucket Challenge.

This is not like the Ice bucket challenge that went around several years ago. I don’t want anyone dumping buckets of ice water over your head. Instead, I want you to start with a jar, and hopefully, we will work up to needing a bucket.

Every time that someone gives you a compliment, no matter how small, I want you to write it on a piece of paper. Make sure that you date the paper and put who complimented you. Here is an example:

10-10-2021 – “The cashier at Target told me that I had a beautiful smile.”

One, this will make you more aware of the smallest compliments that we sometimes shrug off. Two, writing down the compliment tells your brain that you have a beautiful smile, and you will believe it. Three, since you are thinking about compliments, you will GIVE more compliments to others. This will spread lots of joy and happiness everywhere you go. And, four, on days when you are feeling like a poser or an imposter, you can grab a few slips from the jar and remember who you are and who made you!

Song of Songs 4:7

You are altogether beautiful, my darling; there is no flaw in you.

So, today, grab a jar and make it your compliment jar. Then, today, give out 5-10 compliments to people you meet and watch their eyes light up. It will become addicting!

To God Goes The Glory!

Have A Blessed Day!

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  1. beth byrd wrote:

    Years back, on the last day of my preschool teaching position, my head teacher presented me with a beautiful scrapbook. Inside were notes and letters that she had asked the parents to write to me as I said my farewell. To this day, it is one of the most precious gifts I been given.

    Your jar to bucket challenge reminds of that scrapbook. How much those complimentary words mean to me still!

    Posted 10.10.21 Reply
    • Tania wrote:

      Beth, I love the scrapbook idea. That would make a wonderful present for someone for Christmas.

      Posted 10.10.21 Reply
  2. Marla wrote:

    This “fill a jar” idea is GREAT! I plan to share it with my colleagues and clients.

    Posted 10.10.21 Reply
    • Tania wrote:

      Please, share away!

      Posted 10.10.21 Reply
  3. Carole wrote:

    Great idea I’m starting my jar today! You are a blessing 🥰

    Posted 10.10.21 Reply
    • Tania wrote:

      Wonderful, Carol! I hope your jar fills up quickly, and that you are filling others jars too.

      Posted 10.10.21 Reply
  4. Debra Ann Brown wrote:

    I love your blog.
    I get wonderful tips on style and I love the stories and I love the Bible verses.

    Posted 10.10.21 Reply
    • Tania wrote:

      Yay! I am thrilled that you get so much from my blog!

      Posted 10.10.21 Reply
  5. Gail F wrote:

    From one of God’s “Princess “ to you, thanks for reminding all of us we may not be perfect, but we’re loved completely by our Father, what could be better!!!

    Posted 10.10.21 Reply
    • Tania wrote:

      We couldn’t ask for a better Father!

      Posted 10.10.21 Reply
  6. Linda wrote:

    This is a great idea!

    I follow you because you inspire and are a gentle guide!

    Posted 10.10.21 Reply
    • Tania wrote:

      Thanks, Linda. I appreciate your saying that.

      Posted 10.10.21 Reply
  7. Diane wrote:

    yes, and yes and yes! as if you have read my thoughts. I know I’m not the only person who feels this way, but it’s so great to hear it again from you. Thank you, and also for the reminder that He made us, and we are therefore what and who we are supposed to be, and we are just to remain true and keep on keeping on.
    I follow you because I can hear it in your blogs that you are honest with us. I love the feeling that you are so REAL, and you are a woman just like me, just doing your best to be the best YOU.

    Posted 10.10.21 Reply
    • Tania wrote:

      I am so glad that you enjoyed the post. Yes, we are all trying to do our best, and we are all way more alike than we know.

      Posted 10.10.21 Reply
  8. Julie wrote:

    You have inspired me with your daily blogs and I am sure you have done the same for many women. Reading about what you do each day, trying to help others, is huge and makes me want to be a better person, even if in a very small way. Life can be difficult, but your blogs have a calming effect on me and make me know everything will be alright.

    Posted 10.10.21 Reply
    • Tania wrote:

      Julie, thank you so much for your kind words. I am honored that you feel that way about my blog.

      Posted 10.10.21 Reply
  9. Jeni wrote:

    This is a great idea. It also reminds you that you are loved!

    Posted 10.10.21 Reply
    • Tania wrote:

      Exactly, Jeni! We tend to think the worst of ourselves, instead of the best.

      Posted 10.10.21 Reply
  10. Kelley wrote:

    Great post. Thanks for sharing how we all feel at times!

    Posted 10.10.21 Reply
    • Tania wrote:

      I knew that I wasn’t the only one who felt this way.

      Posted 10.10.21 Reply
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