I am sure that most of you saw or heard about the death of Kate Spade. Another well-known individual, Anthony Bourdain, also passed away this week. The really sad thing about these deaths is that they both died by suicide. I am sure that being famous has its own type of pressure, the kind that I can’t even begin to understand. And, since I have always been a “glass full” kind of gurl, suicide is a hard concept for me to understand.
There are a lot of reasons that people take their lives but the main one seems to be depression. Depression’s definition is: feelings of severe despondency and dejection. I am sure that is an accurate definition but I believe it goes so much further than that. I have never been depressed and I have not actually known anyone that suffered from depression, so my feelings are simply based on what I have read from others.
Imagine a world where you don’t care if you get out of bed in the morning. Nothing feels good, tastes good, and you feel like nobody loves you. Nothing you do is ever good enough so why would you even bother?
You or I could point out plenty of reasons to get out of bed and I could tell you hundreds of things that are going good in your life. But, when someone is truly depressed, it is not a matter of mindset. People can be cruel because they don’t understand what a person is going through. Well-meaning friends might think they are helping when in fact, they can be putting more pressure on the person.
Sayings things like, “Suck it up buttercup,” “You are being overly sensitive,” You’re being selfish,” or even “there are lots of people who are worse off than you” doesn’t help and can even add more pressure. Even if you are like me and don’t really understand depression, you can still be supportive. It is a matter of showing empathy, grace, kindness, and friendship. Try simply saying, “It’s okay,” “I love you,” “How can I help?” “I am here for you,” or “You are not alone” might be of some help.
I am not saying that therapy or medication shouldn’t be used, I am saying that support and friendship should be in ADDITION to those things. Be kind and supportive of things we know nothing about. Talk to someone in pain, listen closely, pay attention to warning signs, and urge them to get professional help.
When someone commits suicide the people around them usually carry guilt around. Why did this happen? Why didn’t I see this coming? “I didn’t think they really meant it.” My heart aches for the family and friends of those touched by such a devastating loss.
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
The righteous person may have many troubles,
but the Lord delivers him from them all;
If you, or anyone you know, are struggling with suicidal thoughts please go to the Suicide Prevention Lifeline website. It has warning signs to look for and a phone number to call if you want to talk.
I hope you have a blessed day!