CONTROLLING THE CONTROLLABLES

Life comes at you hard. Life comes at you fast. Life comes at you sideways. There are times when I feel like life is just a roller coaster ride with all the ups, downs, and curves thrown in. I can be traveling along thinking everything is rainbows and the next then you know storm clouds have descended and it looks like it is going to be a stormy ride.

Years ago I was fretting over going to visit my daughter in Alaska for the first time. I do not really like flying and it was going to be several very long flights before I reached my destination. My sister was trying to reason with me about the safety of flying, etc. and she asked me what exactly was the problem. I finally said that it was because I was not in control. I couldn’t control the pilot or the plane. She started laughing and then told me these words that stay with me all the time, “You’re not in control of anything!”

I knew what she meant, she meant that the Lord was the only one really in control. The funny thing is, that actually calmed me down. If any body is going to be in control I feel much better knowing that it is the Lord.

BUT, here are some things that she was wrong about. There are several things that we “can” control. The first thing is our attitude. Attitude is a choice. You can choose to be hateful or snippy or you can choose to be loving and caring. This is in your power.

You can control your emotions. You can’t help what life throws at you but you can choose to limit the amount of “drama” that you allow in your life. Certain situations are emotional and we either are sad or happy. But, it is the other emotions that we let dictate our day that we can control. Someone leaves a comment on your Facebook page, someone told a friend a lie, someone is mad at you, etc. These are small examples of drama that you can choose to ignore or you can get all riled up and pretty soon you are right in the middle of a nightmare.

You can control the comparison bug. The bug that makes you look at someone else and say, “I’ll never be that skinny,” “My kids never loved on me like that,” “I could never have a house that nice.” Really, you never know what the real truth of their situations is. The person who is skinny could have an eating disorder or be sick, the child that is loving could really just be trying to connive something out of the parent, and the house could be such a financial strain that their marriage is taking a toll. Don’t get caught up in the I am not a good scenario, instead, remember that you have enough and that you are good enough.

And you can control your actions. You can choose to whine and gripe about your situation or you can choose to take your plea to the Lord. You can waste time worrying about what some one else is doing or you can be doing something yourself.

In my little airplane story, I could have fretted and worried and hated the entire journey to Alaska. Instead, I chose to thank the Lord for the opportunity to go visit my daughter. Instead, I chose to pray for the pilot and for a safe trip. Instead, I chose to spend the time looking out the window and marveling at God’s creations, the beautiful mountains, the gorgeous clouds that we flew through, and just the majesty of the landscape below. All of these things would have been missed had I chose not to fly or if I had chose to spend my time being so afraid that I wouldn’t look out the window.

Life can be hard and there are many things we can’t control but controlling the controllable’s is at least a way to have a happier life.

Have a Blessed Sunday.

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  1. I love everything about your blog: your stories, the timely advice about life situations, the fashion and beauty hints, and your witness of faith through this medium. Thank you

    • Thanks, Charlotte. I truly think that my Sunday posts are the reason I was prompted to start a blog, I just didn’t know it.

  2. Another great Sunday sermon! Seriously, you have a way of blessing others, with your thoughts. Keep up the inspiring words, very appreciated. Love to you and yours!

  3. Oh I learned that the hard way! When I wasn t able to work anymore, because of my lungdissease, I develloped anxiety and panic attacks because I had no control anymore! I had to learn to accept the tact that I couldn t control everything anymore! That was hard. But now, a few years later, it s relaxing in a way. I accepted it!

    • Nancy, I know what you mean about giving up control. I struggle with this all the time but I am trying to do so much better.

    • Aww, thanks, Lyn. I simply talk about what I am struggling with myself. I figure if I have struggles that others might also.

  4. Thank you so much for your message today. I needed to read that. It blessed me and helped me more than you know. Have a blessed day !

  5. I love your blog. I love your outfits. The are so refreshing (not the same everyday). And I love your messages on Sunday. Thank you. Your blog is my very favorite and I do read quite a few. πŸ™‚

  6. Tania, you are one of the best bloggers I know. Actually, we’ve never met but I feel like I really know you. Not only is your fashion style great and very much like my own – well I don’t really do the bright patterns but I am trying – but you also make me feel good when reading your Sunday “sermons”. In addition, you have me thinking about blogging as a “twilight career” when I retire. Not about fashion but about something my husband and I have been doing to prepare for retirement. Sorry this is so long but I felt I had to let you know how inspiring you are!

    • Linda, you are too kind. Who knew all those years of buying clothing was setting me up for a blog in my later years. Lol! I really am enjoying the blog and all the nice people I have made friends with. Be sure that we are friends on Facebook, that is how I get a glimpse into your life as well.

  7. Thank you Tania. I really enjoyed this and can see similarities in my life too! I’m going to remember how you pushed through the fear and marvelled at God’s creations.

  8. Tania, I loved your blog today. It is so correct for everyone. A lot of people make more drama in their life that it has to be. I try to control the drama in my life as much as possible. It is very hard. Sometimes I just want to give up in my pity party time, this is what my daughter tells me i do a lot. Thanks again and keep up the great work.

    • Dianne, it is so true about drama. There are people who seem to love all the attention and the talk but I would just like to be left out of the mess. Not my circus, not my monkeys. Although, sometimes it is my circus and those are my monkeys. Lol! Then I just try to take a deep breath, pray, and control what little “I” can.

  9. Beautifully said !! You are one beautiful woman inside and out — inspiring and funny !! Thanks for sharing your heart and your life so openly – May God bless you special today !!

  10. Good thoughts!! Thank you, and I’m glad you went to Alaska!! I saw your posts and reminded me of my wonderful trip to Alaska!!

  11. Amen! Words well said, I have anxiety and struggle with it daily. Thank you for the encouraging words ,I needed to hear it today. It’s like you were speaking to me. Life is a daily struggle but we can control our thoughts and feelings. Thank you for the post. Have a awesome Sunday!

  12. Your words are so true! This serves as a great reminder! Thanks!
    (we went to Alaska last year. Where in Alaska does your daughter live?)

  13. Amen! I am having a hysterectomy on Thursday, and I am choosing to pray for the doctor and have faith that I will be fine. I am asking others to pray for me because I know that there is power in the prayers of believers. Please remember me this Thursday the 10th!

    • Sandi, I will say a little prayer for you. I hate surgery, it is so scary. While you are not in control of the surgery itself, the Lord is.

  14. Beautiful reminders today, Tania. It is easy to feel like a victim when hard times hit. Even in the darkest times; especially in those times, we need to remember that God has us in the palm of His hand. He pulls us up and gives us the ability to choose joy and be thankful. We lost our son and my Mom these past two years and a big part of the healing has been the decisions and attitude we make about how to go on, day by day. I love your blog and find all kinds of inspiration here! Thank you.

    • Susan, I can’t imagine your pain and the suffering that has happened. I know that we will be reunited one day but the present can be hard. I like to think that I could be thankful for the times that I had with my loved one but until you walk that road you don’t know how you will react. It is great that you have reached out to the Lord for the strength that will get you through the times of struggle.

  15. Ah — just what I needed to hear today. The company where I work is moving … which will require me to drive a bit of a distance via highway during rush hour! This thought terrifies me. But, after reading your post I realize I am not in control and that I can manage this new situation with God’s help! Your post has given me the confidence to face this new challenge! Thank you!!

  16. I’m struggling. Thank you for reminding me of what I already know. Only my sweet Jesus can take care of it all!!

  17. You are so Right, you can choose what drama you let in your life. I learned a long time ago that in order to be happy with who I was, I had to stop listening to those that had nothing Nice or good to say! Every day i try to post positive comments, sayings on my facebook page in hopes that it helps get others through their daily routine. Thank you for your inspiring posts, your beautiful Smile, and your love of fashion. I’m so glad that I found your blog!! Many Blessings to you!!

  18. I’m so glad you made the trip to Alaska. I have so much fear that stops me from doing things. The main thing I wanted to say is that I never feel like I am enough. I try to believe that I am, I try not to compare myself to other women but deep in my heart I just can’t shake the feeling that I am not good enough.

  19. Thank you for another Sunday post that is so inspirational . I love reading your posts everyday and thank you for always making us feel good about ourselves! God Bless and enjoy your Sunday Tania😊

  20. Good Job Tania! Your sweet message last month helped me the have courage to get on the plane to London! I’m home with lots of memories but I was sure scared. You touch a lot of lives, thank you for your blog!!

  21. GOD is in control, and I have to remind myself of that daily, especially when we are trying to control something as mother’s, that we cannot. God knows what is going on, we just have to step back~BREATHE, and give it to him!!
    Have a great week.